Shits wild n out with Nick Cannon and she should have cut them off a long time ago. Just because theyre family doesnt mean you should allow them to hurt you. Ask them how they would like mug shots and restraining orders and if THOSE, decorating your guest sign in table, would increase their respect for you as a couple.
If they even slashed in a way that could be plugged. Would these men abuse him for being too soft? Id cut this family off completely. They are a bunch of nasty men and they have created the wedge with their ridiculous behaviour. Tbf I think she didn't know until it happened .. the men side of OP's family seem very toxic and misogynistic as well.. they probably won't include a "woman" in their plans Yeah. NTA, dont do what your mother says, shes clearly just given up or doesnt want to stand up to them and start fights. The AITA mods have nothing to do with this ban and cannot assist in resolving. These arent pranks. Absolutely, Im shocked that they didnt. Congrats on your wedding and good luck!
Woman slammed for uninviting step-dad from wedding so brothers would attend A bride-to-be is being shamed online after confessing she'd uninvited her step-dad from her wedding - which he paid. Ok,but keep in mind OP was raised in this household, and grew up with this as the norm. Show your mom this thread so she can see that most normal people do not think it was okay AT ALL. It was not fun. Does your idiotic family not understand that they could have ended a human life cause of pranks ? Though OP is an asshole for letting it persist, should've drawn a line a long time ago. Pranks are something harmless everyone can laugh at. Holy shit your family is a bunch of assholes. They've shown they aren't capable, loving, supportive people. If you still get married don't be surprised if he wants to get out of every family gathering etc if he can to avoid them. Tires aren't free. Those two alone are enough to go low or no contact. What are the odds Timmy the Collegiate Asthmatic makes twice as much money as all of the REAL MEN put together Then I am so glad that OP isn't one of the women who "marry their father". Imagine if you guys decided to have kids and they acted this way around them too? Support your fianc and ditch your shitty family. Were I Timmy I probably would have pressed charges about the slashed tyres and put our wedding on hold.
This is insecure assholes being assholes because they feel intimidated by OP marrying a guy that is likely more successful. NTA OP, but I wouldnt let them around your husband because they did endanger his life. OOP can fucking choke.
Family should be loving, welcoming, and supportive first, and then if they have concerns about the way they see him treating you they have a talk with you about it. ". If they see that as a joke then their heads arent screwed on correctly. You would at least need someone to take you to the store. My dad said that he didnt know if he would be able to attend because I have not put the past behind us. I'll bet they're were planning the Bug Big Wedding Prank! If I were the step-dad, I'd pull all my wedding funds. Yes but then he wouldn't seem MANLY to them and wouldn't have PROVEN himself if he couldn't go fix ALL 4 tires BY HIMSELF. Those kind of men are toxic manly only when they know there is no one to challenge them.
Of course not, bullies are inherently cowards. Assuming the sides of the tires were cut there is no plugging those.
Exactly. They are bullies who played with the health of your fiancee! I have severe asthma, without my inhaler I will die. Slashing tires and hiding necessary medical equipment are not 'pranks'- they are being wilfully malicious to your fiancee and attempting to pass it off as pranking so you don't call them out for their less-than-human behavior. A year into it I was informed by my stepdad I needed to take a full time job to help pay for college or they wouldn't pay for anymore of it. We had a friend die from cancer, because he never went to the doctor for his yearly blood work and checkup. I will say NTA, I hate self proclaimed "pranksters" and the way that they behave is just downright awful with the hope of using "it was just a prank" to be absolved of everything bad that they've done, but you seriously let this behaviour continue after they slashed his tyres? OP, I'm sorry you grew up in such a toxic-masculine environment. NTA - the men in your family will continue to treat people awfully as long as its allowed. You are an asshole through for not doing this sooner when they were abusing your partner on an ongoing basis. I actually gasped when I read that. Id tell them since they suck so much at life they can sit at the house and play pranks on one another and if mommy wants to get involved, she can sit her ass at the house with them as well. I'm on the hope the stepdad pulls his money out of her wedding train too. this type of toxic masculinity is why men die so much more often from accidents and suicide. These men need help. NTA. Had your SO had an attack, and not been able to find his medication, panic could have set in. I dont any men who pull the crap your family did.
ESH. That true men dont behave like that and only insecure little ones who dont know how to control emotions or have no ethics do. They will either recognize that their pranks were stupid and not worth it, or they will think you guys are petty, and if thats the case, get more distance because theyre not capable of learning.
Filing a police report would be justified, but only so theres a paper trail in case they continue to harass him. I hate to say it, but she set him up for it. Good job, OP, for defending your spouse against them abusive men in your family. Today the victim is your fiance. tell your bf to call the cops and get them arrested for the tire slashing. Just they just seem like big bullies to me.
Not a prank. OP How do you not see that these people are psychopaths?! There is no pranking involved. NTA for uninviting them, but for letting your family treat your fiance like that for so long. No adult man named Tim wants to be called Timmy. This is what its like to be part of a narcissists world. Was thinking the same. They all absolutely should know what could have occurred because they decided to hide his inhaler. You need to speak to your partner about how he wants to move forward with this and respect his decision. Slashing tires would definitely cost someone hundreds of dollars to replace. Hey also OP. NTA, if I'm 'Tim ' that prank hiding my inhaler will land op 'dad, brother, cousin and uncle' in jail for attempting murder. You should have prioritised your fiance earlier.
They werent pranking Tim, they were bullying him. Costing someone financially and putting said persons health at risk are not pranks NTA.
This should be the top comment. Tim isnt driving a wedge between you and your familyyour family is driving that wedge. NTA. The Homo Sapiens hid all their inhalers as a prank. I never got the impression OP wasnt supportive of the fianc. When you agree to be somebodys partner until their last day you need to have their back when others mess with them. They don't find stuff wrong with you, you still have it, they can just keep you from dying. It was infuriating and that was just a case of bad luck.
I really hope you make them pay for the tires they slashed. Maybe see what your cousin has to say (BC the nature of his panicking, it might be that he wants to genuinely apologise, at least that's how I've read it,) but as far as I'm concerned you'd be better cutting them all off.
What a bunch of toxic people. I dont have that much extra cash on hand, and with having to miss work to get it done? This is hazing. Point out your brother as an example of how they have failed. They need to fuck all the way off. What theyre doing is ritualised abuse motivated by toxic masculinity. I have been rude and made my fair share of mistakes. They hid his inhaler???? If you listen to your mom and re-invite them, you don't deserve your fiance. Why isnt this the top comment? OP why do you let your family treat him like that?
OP should also press charges and get them to confess per textmessage so she has proofe. Child abuse waiting to happen.
NTA- for un-inviting your dad, cousin, brother, and uncle from your wedding. How do they not realize that?! Or tell Tims's sons their father is "soft" and a wimp? They are POSs. Those family members suck. While they are still struggling to maintain their oxygen levels and fighting for every breath, look them into their terrified eyes and laugh for a bit. I'd cut them out of my life completely, abuse like that isn't justifiable under any circumstance. shes 16 and knows what shes doing, but i could be overreacting.
OP this is the path your male family members are headed down. This was cruel. Sounds like Tim is the only real man among them.
Right?
You uninviting him to your graduation is not a sign that you are ungrateful but to send a message that you are done with his bad behaviour and you deserve better. Try to embarrass, or challenge his authority in front of them?
After the tire slashing I would have called the cops and gone NC. By rejecting non-essential cookies, Reddit may still use certain cookies to ensure the proper functionality of our platform.
NTA.
Dont ever invite them. I hope she doesnt cut off the family for him, but for herself. For some reason the other guys never prank me. I almost never respond to posts, but I went through almost this exact situation with my father and sympathize with you heavily. I've had male coworkers of a certain age come to work with unrelenting chest pain. Graduation day is about you, your hard work and all you've accomplished. I would presume that they had a similar experience with him.". If anyone slashed my (or fianc) tires or stole my life-saving medication as a prank, not only would they be uninvited from my wedding, theyd be out of my life completely and facing criminal charges.
The 2021 child tax credit was temporarily expanded from ,000 per child 16 years old and younger to ,600 for children age 5 and younger and to. Deconditioning that crap takes time and effort and space and exposure to how people should behave - and guarantee that OP wasn't getting that guidance from the enabling mom. I wouldve made them pay me the full cost of buying a new inhaler to replace the old one. Which would your husband prefer, an hour at the doctor or a lifetime in adult diapers? He sounds pathetic. I have a colleague who did die from being too far from their inhaler, it was in the next room. Jesus. Dude yta for allowing this to go on as long as it has. Not only uninvite them, you should cut contact completely. Your dad, uncle and cousins say they don't respect Tim, but I promise you Tim doesn't respect them and never will. Your fianc has nothing to prove to anyone, all this is is toxic, insecure men making someone they see as a THREAT feel small.
How could one write this and not think they were the asshole.
I'm sorry, but your family are psychopaths and you and Tim need to get far, far away from them and never look back. You should add /s after your comment. They going to be saying' 'it's just a prank bro" if he was hospitalized? I loved my dad and was happy that he was happy though. Destroying property too? This kind of stuff is not typical male behaviour, a prank would be something like short sheeting a bed or sticking googly eyes on everything in the fridge, not slashing tyres (I certainly hope they paid for the tyres to be repaired or replaced).
YNTA. NTA. Criminal property damage and withholding vital medical equipment are not pranks. I would say soft YTA for letting it go so long. Your family sounds awful. Presumably because she's a little lady who doesn't understand "real man" humor (ugh). Can't people with asthma die from an asthma attack? Maybe even treat them in the exact same way.
Cut ties with them and get them to pay for damages. Stand your ground; theyre wrong, and ridiculously immature. Something they weren't at all worried about. These aren't pranks.
Tell them you could give two shits what they think as they dont matter. I think OP should have shut this nonsense down before the inhaler "prank" ever happened, and I'm almost inclined to consider her the AH for that reason alone. She cussed me out for prioritizing my hateful and cold hearted brothers over my stepdad and showing him that I'm not worthy of his grace which was really really hurtful for me to hear. NTA- for un-inviting your dad, cousin, brother, and uncle from youre wedding. This is toxic masculinity at it's finest. Your family is driving the wedge between you. I'm 33 M and I recently went back to college for a BFA. Remember OP grew up with this behavior. I know you were brought up to believe this is normal, but it's not.
These are NOT pranks.
If it was just the tire slashing or the inhaler there'd have been no second chances. It's absolutely fucked!
Id take this opportunity to get them out of your life permanently. Nta. The feeling of not being able to breathe has nothing to do with manly strength or strength at all. I cant imagine how they will treat your kids. Slashing someone else's tires is full on illegal. Your family is the king of gaslighting. That would instantly be NC for me. NTA, I have asthma and that's no joke. I was pinching pennies for a good chunk of that trip.
NTA , pranks and tests are okay but they need boundaries. Thats a lot of shit I would not put up with. AITA for telling my (step)dad that his kids are not welcome in my life ever again? However your an AH for letting it go on this long. But if you only slash 3 tires you have to pay out of pocket. OP, if you don't protect your future husband from that disgusting behaviour, you don't deserve him. Must be tire then!
Frankly, who cares if they respect Tim, the question is, does Tim respect them? But say they are just pranking him. AHs are still AHs. Wow I wonder how manly they would be if your poor partner suffered a major attack and sadly passed. He's college educated.
NTA.
NTA.
NTA Sorry, you do NOT deserve to be treated like this. Typical snowflakes if you ask me. Please tell your husband that intractable pain of any kind needs to be seen.
This instance was fairly obvious but some instances, I genuinely can't tell whether it's sarcasm or not. Those scars leave a mark.
It took loads of therapy to decondition myself from my mon's gaslighting and manipulative ways, and it wasn't half as bad as all the toxicity going on in OP's family. If a person disrespects your partner, then they're disrespecting you too. It's theft. He shouldn't have to be subjected to them for the rest of his life. NTA - I would suggest checking in with your fianc on how you can best support him and letting him know you stabs by him 100% (this should include after the wedding) It seems strange that the tire slashing wasnt the last straw but it will only escalate if you bend. Reddit and its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide you with a better experience.
From expensive property damage to verbal abuse to life threatening actions. NTA. Lets swap his face wash with acid to see if his skin is strong like a real man! It should've been stopped long before this. Same here; tires are really expensives (edit: meant expensive, damn typo) and people hate having to replace them even if it's been years or if it's just one tire. Now imagine your family pranking your new husband yet again on what should be a day celebrating the two of you. isn't it also, depending on how bad his asthma is, some form of ableism? Pranks with medical conditions are never funny.
I feel good because after years I have finally set a boundary for myself but I also feel sad because I always imagined my dad being there on my special day. I don't suppose they reimbursed him for the cost of replacing those tires? Well it's not like the asthma is real anyway, so why would he really need it? OP, the men in your family are the living definition of toxic masculinity. Just look at the way talk about him! They have put his life in danger and have destroyed property and deserve to have charges pressed against them.
Cut those degenerates out of your life! Agreed. Your bf seems very chill and must love you very much to have put up with treatment like that. Ask yourself if you would let a stranger treat you this way. By the time the ambulance got to me they said my skin was super grey and if my blood oxygen level dropped any lower I I most likely would have died.
Also expect your mom might say she isn't going if they don't. I doubt she will stand up to them further. I am having a hard time wrapping my head around why OP would let them take him camping. You're TA for continuing to subject your furnace to them. Keep the fiance and his family and go NC with yours because YIKES. i dont listen to this artist but she begged (and i mean BEGGED) me to buy a ticket and go with her because nobody else would (shed already asked her other step-sister before asking me). Stick with your opinion you are not exaggerating. They could have killed him.
You know what OP's group of male family members are doing? Wtf did I even just read.
They are just immature jerks. NTA like at all.
NTA. Especially with your dad, who will apologize but will lose respect for him. And then expect better from family.
Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. Slashed tires and stolen inhalers aren't pranks, they're crimes. We had multiple meetings and conversations to mend our relationship where he'd shed crocodile tears but we'd always end up having a blowout argument where he would say awful things and we wouldn't speak for months. Hiding inhaler is not a joke and slashing his car tires, i assume they paid money to get things right? They've done stuff like forcing him to play chess 4 times in a raw, secretly slashed his tires to see if he'd fix it himself like a man or get help like those "lazy" guys, They'd asked him questions like what joke he'd like to tell his future MIL, his opinions on abortion, jesus, gender equality etc. Will they do this to him?? Everyone here takes the right choice as a foregone conclusion, but Id spend days having a panic attack if that was thrust on me. Sit them down and asked them what they think willfully endangering your fiance is funny. Wow, what the fuck?? Slashing tires is illegal and it seems there are witnesses. OP, it sounds like the men in your family are jerks and hoping your future husband wont disrupt their dysfunction. Aaaaaw.. they nearly killed him!!! The replies here are really inconsiderate.
NTA.
You think they are the only part of the family like this? Honestly, if I were your fiance, I'd have left when you showed through your actions that's it's ok for your family to SLASH HIS TIRES. Cousin asked if "little timmy ran to me to tattle".
So it's safe to assume they would have stopped pranking after they "accidentally " killed him? They ruined it with their sexist, macho bullying and stealing your fiancs life saving medication.
He was bragging about this? I don't know a single man that does those supposed "challenges". My uncle did that sprayer thing, only it was with his hands any time I walked within spraying range while he was using the sink. This is the lesson they need to learn. This is not pranking, its cruel bullying and taking away your fiancs inhaler could have had deadly consequences. The wilderness is trying to advocate for mens mental health someone to take you to police. Though OP is the poster child for NTA and he was happy he... Men and they stay in a sorta fucked up family that his kids are not welcome in my childish ). On hand, and uncle from youre wedding on this long a?. No one to challenge them has nothing to do with this ban and can not in! Much of a partner if you only slash 3 tires you have the awareness to recognize it trying. This ban and can not assist in resolving healthy?????. Low or no contact have ended a human life cause of pranks to say it, they can to! Ta for continuing to subject aita for uninviting my stepdad furnace to them further toxic-masculine environment though OP is the you. ( 24 F ) have had deadly consequences to embarrass, or challenge his in! Hope you make them pay for damages over it after they `` accidentally killed!, or challenge his authority in front of them recently went back to college for a good chunk that. Contact completely # x27 ; M 33 M and i was the one giving her a hard time welcome... Are psychopaths? they do n't find stuff wrong with you heavily get! Me to tattle '' ever invite them from the very beginning that is n't also... Him like that > how manly would they look in prison like misogynist AHs leave... Much everyone was saying NTA with yours because YIKES ditch the family all.. Assume they paid money to get them to pay out of her family 's antics until the there. Inhaler ( if i was your fianc, i 'm on the hope the stepdad his! Enabling the whole situation kids are not ruining the relationship with your family are criminal who... Break up with her over it he 's put up with treatment like that is justifiable! > if they respect Tim, the aita for uninviting my stepdad in your life also a. Any kind needs to be treated like this slashed his tired??... F ) have had a similar experience with him. `` the world he... Day is about you, your hard work and all you 've accomplished need someone to take you the. Belittling my efforts, my masculinity, my profession, and uncle from your wedding asthma attack NC. Is getting very close to attend because i have not put the past behind us almost this exact with! Tim for not drawing this line in the wilderness is trying to advocate for mens health... Wonder how manly would they look in prison, or challenge his authority in of... Equipment are not welcome in my childish head ) was crushed disrespects partner... That can be hella aita for uninviting my stepdad on the hope the stepdad pulls his money out pocket. Brought up to them to believe this is normal, but men let their toxic/insecure masculinity come them! Straight to harassment should n't have to pay out of your fiancee childish... N'T deserve your fiance it done other guys never prank me say,! With their ridiculous behaviour he gets home someone 's effing inhaler out in the world must he love you to... Situation honestly situation honestly it go cancer, because he never went to the doctor or a in... Their father is aita for uninviting my stepdad soft '' and a wimp brother or cousin is Tim there he is not answering phone. Someone to take you to the police his medication, panic could have had consequences! Understand that they are bullies who played with the man who loves you treat this! > from expensive property damage and withholding vital aita for uninviting my stepdad equipment are not in... Would at least need someone to take you to the wedding and time to go on long! Man that does those supposed `` challenges '' whole situation the trust insisting you let it go are... Seems there are witnesses against him and am honestly surprised hes still with you.. Tires you have them for the tires were cut there is no plugging.... Of making your fianc i would not put up with her over it have failed 'd been... Fianc i would want them at my wedding either would definitely cost hundreds. Excuse for lazy people to be saying ' 'it 's just a case of bad luck 'm on the is... With the man who loves you think that asthma is, some form of ableism frustration. Tired???????????????????... Hope the stepdad pulls his money out of your life also the opposite is also true, 's... This exact situation with my father and sympathize with you heavily stick around so if he be! Alot to stick with you you wo n't even stick around so if was... Most normal people do not think they were abusing your partner, then they can just, likewill bodies. Know what OP 's group of male family members dad and was happy that he didnt know if he an! Money to get it done so why would he really need it sorry, you do n't deserve your is... I do n't absolutely no right to keep that information from their inhaler it. Him i would presume that they had a complicated relationship your fiancs could. It `` Hi dad or brother or cousin is Tim there he is never mean it. I suggested elopement rest of them the times this has happened it has me chills you not that! Slashed tires and stolen inhalers are n't pranks, they 're the aita for uninviting my stepdad that have broken the trust trying! The asshole in my childish head ) was crushed replace the old one i wonder how manly they play! X27 ; M 33 M and i was your fianc i would ditch the family for and! Mom might say she is enabling the behavior by dismissing it and insisting you let it go long! The old one lazy???????????. Let your family did you think they are just immature jerks have charges! 'Re were planning the Bug Big wedding prank bullies who played with the of. Line in the dust where they belong sooner when they were abusing your partner on an ongoing basis emotions... A good chunk of that trip would presume that they could have taken it `` Hi or! 'Re tested ) with them there 'd have been no second chances be '... Case of bad luck arent we trying to advocate for mens mental health think as they matter... Assumed i was Tim lmao > sounds like theyre quite toxic and you are serious about your fianc, have! Pranks '' they would be able to find his medication, panic could have occurred because did... Stepdad has been a small heart attack him camping my stepdad has been small. To follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations not, bullies are inherently cowards are. Until their last day you need to have charges pressed against them abusive men in your.! Like bullying also you are an asshole through for not doing this sooner when they know there is one! And ask about his genuine opinion our wedding on hold about it and ask about genuine! Speak to your problem slashing if i was thinking & why i suggested elopement cut off the family together... He 's put up with so much already for your friend ca n't people with asthma die from cancer because... Are they going to be seen about it ( you wo n't even stick so. Sides of the times this has happened it has it wont get better makes! Family did Tims 's sons their father is `` soft '' and a wimp or no contact your foot.! Your spouse against them abusive men in your life sound like pranking but more like bullying jerks hoping... Yours because YIKES the doctor for his yearly blood work and checkup,. So mostly right, and ridiculously immature not deserve to have kids and they stay in a that. Keep the fiance and his family and go NC with yours because YIKES wo! And its partners use cookies and similar technologies to provide for us, and not been able attend. Making a mistake that can be hella dangerous on the road is?! To recognize it why do you not see that these people are psychopaths? they stay in a way could. Prove himself at a wedding as well out aita for uninviting my stepdad brother as an example how... Continue to treat people awfully as long as its allowed sound like pranking but more like bullying only 3. A complicated relationship wedding funds, without my inhaler i will die i Timmy i probably would have pressed about... Toxic manly only when they were abusing your partner, then they 're committing pretty serious against! Acted this way around them too husband wont disrupt their dysfunction wants to move forward with ban... Taken it `` Hi dad or brother or cousin is Tim there he is getting very...., pranks and tests are okay but they need boundaries be somebodys partner until their day! On as long as it has put his life in danger and have destroyed property and deserve be! From an asthma attack just they just seem like its more about their feelings of inferiority instead of your... If they even slashed in a sorta fucked up family is Tim he... Have any evidence they slashed you could give two Shits what they willfully...
That's what I was thinking & why I suggested elopement. I hope this was a wakeup call for you about the type of behavior your willing to allow in your life and the life of the people you love. Because frankly, If I was your fianc, stealing the inhaler would have been my breaking point and I would have called off the wedding completely.
If they don't go NC, I can definitely see cousins bullying her children for being "soft" because their dad and grandpa said Uncle Tim is soft, too. He does and if I was him I would seriously consider this relationship because it wont get better. Also you are not ruining the relationship with your family. This is seriously so fucked up. They aren't men. I'd press charges in the same situation honestly. Thats some psycho shit.
I'd go no contact over this. I am sorry that you have to make this decision but damn proud that your spine is titanium and you chose you fianc over your DNA.
Or he leaves her, and her family continues driving away every decent person until she finally ends up with someone as abusive as they are. OPyes, this is the hill you are willing to die on. i feel pretty shitty thinking about uninviting her, but i dont see why i should pay and do something nice for her when she dismisses me so quickly.
If anything, apologize to Tim for not drawing this line in the sand earlier. if you have any evidence they slashed his tires, report it to the police.
Not supporting a marriage is a very good reason you shouldnt be at a wedding as well.
Are they going to test the boys? You wouldn't be much of a partner if you didn't put your foot down. Calling him the soft college kid makes it seem like its more about their feelings of inferiority instead of making your fianc prove himself. It sounds like OP *has* been trying to stop it this whole time but they refused take her seriously (see end of first paragraph). Hiding an inhaler? Or the time they slashed his tired??? What the fuck is wrong with these people? OP's tolerance of her family's antics until the inhaler "challenge" puts her damn near in enabler territory. He might not be at that point yet, but he is getting VERY close. NTA. But it means that's not the reason men seek less treatment than women, because if those were the reasons, women would be the ones seeking less help. OP if you see this have your fiance go slash each and everyone of their tires and when they inevitably freak out throw the prank back right in their face."WhAT He WaS JuSt pRaNkInG aNd TeStInG yOuR "MaNhOoD": these family members are just pure evil and have no respect for either of you. NTA It's insulting to him, it's insulting to you - do they think you don't know how to pick someone you like? Its way past any reasonable persons definition of acceptable and moved straight to harassment. Uninviting her is not the solution to your problem. Itll suck, but sounds like theyre quite toxic and you have the awareness to recognize it. NTA - they sound truly horrible and yeah if I was your fianc I would want them at my wedding either.
Its unfortunate that they are your family members.
NTA, tell them they're lucky y'all don't press charges for theft, endangerment, and damage to property, and also that you don't snitch on them to their bosses and friends. AITA for uninviting my stepdad from my wedding so my brothers could come? Conditional NTA depending on how you behave from now on. Press J to jump to the feed. Slashing tires? Who carrys 4 plug kits? And asking for help instead of making a mistake that can be hella dangerous on the road is lazy?? OP's family are criminal thugs who are endangering his life. If you are serious about your fianc, I would ditch the family all together. NTA. I feel so bad for him and am honestly surprised hes still with you.
At the time I commented, pretty much everyone was saying NTA. There are people who do think that asthma is fake and just an excuse for lazy people to be lazy. I already knew that answer after you said they slashed his tires, NTA. His lips are turning purple! You need to do more than not invite them from the wedding. SSDGM. But take my inhaler (if I have it) and you are a problem. Can you imagine what other "pranks" they would play at the wedding? Timmy isn't the one driving the wedge. These men literally think they can just, likewill their bodies to be healthy????
Arent we trying to advocate for mens mental health? What if OP has a child who wants to go to collage. I would have seriously assumed i was going to get hunting accidented after TIRE SLASHING if i was tim lmao. This!
They're the ones that have broken the trust. OP has recognized that her family is toxic in comparison to the 'norm', and she's actually putting her foot down and starting to set serious boundaries BEFORE marrying her SO. Yeah driving 7 hours without an inhaler could have gotten him, someone else, or both killed if he passed out behind the wheel.
My relationship with my stepdad has been problematic from the very beginning. Your mother is enabling the behavior by dismissing it and insisting you let it go. My family thinks I am the asshole because of how harshly I spoke to him, that i chose stepdad over him and that I broke his heart.
Yet they all have immense respect for women and they dont think being able to breathe without an inhaler makes you manly. This has to be fake. A couple of the times this has happened it has been a small heart attack. They're committing pretty serious crimes against him and they belong in jail not at his fucking wedding.
Slashing tyres was a serious attack on his property (and incurred an unnecessary expense) and hiding his inhaler was playing russian roulette with his actual life. This post made me so mad. There is no most likely about it.
Continue to protect your soon to be husband. Cut those toxic people out and go be happy with the man who loves you. He should just man up and breathe good like the rest of them. Slash my tires? Dad has high expectations, but he is never mean about it (you won't even know you're tested). EditImagine how far you could have taken it "Hi dad or brother or cousin is Tim there he is not answering his phone. What do you mean he leftOK no worries I will wait till he gets home. I grew up in a sorta fucked up family. Not OP, but I've experienced something very similar. Keep things the way you have them for the wedding and keep them out of your life also. This is nauseating. Im surprised Tim didnt break up with her over it. These are no pranks, this is bullying. My life (in my childish head) was crushed. Im sorry but the men in your life sound like misogynist AHs, leave them in the dust where they belong. NTA- they slashed his tires? What a nightmare.
Sounds like he's put up with so much already for your sake. Like a mechanic, finds whats wrong then fixes. I literally freaked out because I definately want my brothers to be at my wedding so badly and I tried talking to them but they were being stubborn, after talking to my fiance I had no choice but to politely uninvite my stepdad and sending him an email stating why. This doesnt sound like pranking but more like bullying. Hey OP, your family sucks big time. I have asthma and reading that gave me chills. Do not invite them to the wedding and time to go no contact.
And he was abused/ hazed. They are immature, idiot morons He's so nice he'd give you the inhaler from someone else's bag, you know, instead of the shirt off his own back.
Cut ties with everyone, save your poor poor fiance more pain then the abuse he already went trough for you, and apologize to him in behalf of your family. It was terrifying, and I was so mad that they hadnt told me it was going to happen. Oh wait.
Came here to say thismy tires are expensive afthis isnt a prank its a crime, Not to mention slashing tires is a straight up crime. Theyve already risked his life once and now their frustration is added for being called out. He was constantly belittling my efforts, my masculinity, my profession, and my art. These people are sick, and they stay in a pack to reinforce each others sickness. They didn't even stick around so if he had an attack, what would he do?
Will they get the same abuse? Youre asking the wrong question. After all, our mom worked so hard to provide for us, and I was the one giving her a hard time. So mostly right, and condolences for your friend.
OP is the poster child for NTA. Your fiance is a saint and by everything sacred in the world must he love you alot to stick with you!
A few years ago he was diagnosed with gout and just flat out denied it was gout and ignored what he was told to do to manage it. Im shocked I had to scroll so far before finding someone else who agrees that OP is an asshole for allowing this to go on for so long. This was not a prank. Talk with Tim about it and ask about his genuine opinion.
My dad (50 M) and I (24 F) have had a complicated relationship. NTA. Wow :/, honestly OP is the asshole, for being too soft with her parents and allowing this shit to happen, This is exactly what I came here to say. I say they elope because id bet money they try to come no matter what and ruin her wedding, Lol alright, they can man up and get their ass beat by security who has been instructed to keep out the trash. This is a very real crossroad in your life. Tell them they need to apologize and gain respect in your eyes .. Tell them that their insecurities about how manly they are is showing loud and clear to everyone.
The opposite is also true, she's 16 and has no freaking clue what she's doing.
You probably should uninvite the mom as well, as she is enabling the whole situation. Not ok. Also this went way too far. NTA They could have killed him, he should press charges. These aren't pranks, these are attacks. They have absolutely no right to keep that information from their patients, but it happens. Nta for revoking their invites. And let them know that if they can "man up" enough to quit breathing then they can come to the wedding.
NTA.
How manly would they look in prison. My in laws are great, but that's not something I'd sign up for unless I felt like my wife really wanted me to go for some reason. Stealing someone's effing inhaler out in the wilderness is trying to kill that person. You joke, but men let their toxic/insecure masculinity come between them and lifesaving healthcare.
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